It was a crisp winter day where the sun shines so brightly it tricks you into thinking it’s warm until you step outside and instantly regret not grabbing your scarf—that I heard about the latest musings from our southern neighbors. The commander-in-chief (yes, President Trump, I’m looking at you) had hinted, joked, or perhaps accidentally tweeted (it’s hard to tell these days) that Canada could become the 51st state.
Instantly, I felt a sinking feeling, like realizing you’d poured cream into your coffee, only to discover it expired yesterday. While I love my American friends and family dearly, the idea of Canada trading in its toques for baseball caps and our loonies for greenbacks makes me want to clutch my maple syrup and build a polite but firm snow fort around our border.
Before we go any further, let me get one thing straight: Though I’m Canadian, I don’t actually say “eh.” For crying out loud, I spent my early years in England, where accents are posh, and sentences end with “isn’t it?” instead of “eh.” When we moved to Canada, I remember Newfies (lovely people from Newfoundland) knocking on our door offering fresh lobster. I found this incredibly strange as a child who thought seafood came exclusively in frozen rectangles. I swore then and there you would never catch me saying “eh.” But here I am—laughing along with the stereotype for the sake of humor. I must clarify: I’m an “eh”-less Canadian.
Our health care: universal, but not perfect
First things first—health care. Up here, it doesn’t matter if you’re a homeless person on the street or a CEO in their penthouse suite; everyone has the same right to life-saving surgery. That’s one of the fundamental principles of the Canadian health care system. Let me spell it out for you:
- Universality: Everyone is covered. Yes, even that one neighbor who keeps forgetting to shovel their driveway.
- Accessibility: You won’t go bankrupt because you broke your leg trying to snowboard for the first time.
- Comprehensiveness: From a sore throat to major surgery, we’ve got you.
- Portability: Moving from one province to another? No problem. Your health card works everywhere.
- Public administration: Health care is run for people, not profit—simple as that.
Sure, we have our challenges. Wait times can be long, and health care workers are stretched thin. But we cherish the peace of mind that comes with knowing you won’t lose your home over medical bills.
Guns: No thanks, we’re good
Now, about guns. Let’s talk about something that makes Canadians twitchier than a moose in mating season: the idea of widespread firearms. In Canada, we like our guns like our winter storms—rare and tightly controlled.
My dear American friends, there has to be a better way. Canadians aren’t perfect (I mean, we still let people put ketchup on macaroni), but when it comes to gun violence, we’re doing something right. Let’s work together to find standard solutions for everyone, eh? (OK, I threw that in for effect—but seriously, I don’t say it.)
FOMO and a prenup, please
To be fair, I have a bit of FOMO about some of the incredible medical centers and cutting-edge technology in the U.S. You’ve got some awe-inspiring innovations down there. But whoa—slow down. Maybe we should date a bit before jumping into a full-on political union.
If we do decide to explore this union (spoiler: We won’t), we’re going to need a prenuptial agreement. Canada’s way of life—our health care, gun control, and general politeness—needs to stay intact. We’ve worked hard to build a society that values equality, community, and saying sorry even when it’s not our fault.
Four seasons, sometimes all at once
And while we’re discussing differences, let’s address the weather. Canada has four distinct seasons—winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction season. Occasionally, we show off by giving you all four seasons in one day. It’s part of the charm. If you’re not ready for that, you’re not prepared to annex us.
Let’s do better together.
This conversation is a reminder of how much I love my home. Canada isn’t perfect. We have our struggles—our health care system is under pressure, our leadership is in flux, and yes, we still put pineapple on pizza (it’s a divisive issue). But the things we hold dear—universal health care, safer streets, and a culture that values people over profit—are worth protecting.
So, my American brothers and sisters, let’s not rush into anything. We appreciate your admiration, but let’s use it as an opportunity to learn from each other. After all, love thy neighbor, isn’t it?
If you’ll excuse me, I need to shovel my driveway before the next snowstorm hits—probably in about five minutes.
Tomi Mitchell is a board-certified family physician and certified health and wellness coach with extensive experience in clinical practice and holistic well-being. She is also an acclaimed international keynote speaker and a passionate advocate for mental health and physician well-being. She leverages over a decade of private practice experience to drive meaningful change.
Dr. Mitchell is the founder of Holistic Wellness Strategies, where she empowers individuals through comprehensive, evidence-based approaches to well-being. Her career is dedicated to transforming lives by addressing personal challenges and enhancing relationships with practical, holistic strategies.
Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn, and book a discovery call to explore how she can support your wellness journey. For those interested in purchasing her book, please click here for the payment link. Check out her YouTube channel for more insights and valuable content on mental health and well-being.
