Most physicians step into their careers already burdened with over $200,000 in student debt, no assets to speak of, and a nagging feeling that they’re way behind. If you’re the primary breadwinner in your family, this pressure can be even more intense. Interestingly, most doctors didn’t pursue medicine for the paycheck. But once that MD is proudly displayed after their name, they are thrust into a relentless sprint to catch up.
It’s easy to overlook a crucial fact: you’re in the top 5 percent of earners. You’ll catch up, no matter how many extra shifts you take or patients you see. Doctors are incredible problem solvers but tend to overcorrect when faced with financial instability. Suddenly, the pendulum swings from having too little money to having plenty but no time to enjoy it. This starts a vicious cycle—making up for missed family time with expensive trips, lavish homes, and luxury cars. Welcome to the “Keeping Up with the Doctor Jones” phase of life, where getting off the track is almost impossible.
Many doctors live a life they never dreamed of—one they had nightmares about—in an effort to give their kids a better life, care for aging parents who sacrificed so much, and buy affection from spouses who’ve felt neglected. Their children become spoiled and disconnected, parents complain about the lack of visits, and spouses, tired of coming last, might eventually ask for a divorce.
“Money can’t buy happiness” is an old adage for a reason—it’s true. Despite the temporary dopamine hits from 5000-square-foot homes, new Range Rovers every two years, and closets full of fancy handbags, these material possessions never suffice. Doctors may chase wealth until the concept of “enough money” becomes so abstract that they can’t define it, even if their lives depend on it.
You might wonder what kind of financial advisor would seemingly demonize wealth. But my intention isn’t to vilify money—it’s to highlight its proper role. Money buys freedom, and freedom is one of life’s sweetest pleasures. Aligning your financial goals with your values before crafting a plan rooted in numbers is essential.
What type of relationship do you want with your spouse? Picture date nights, long weekends in wine country, and never missing an episode of The Bear together. How about your relationship with your kids? Do you hope they’ll always want to hold your hand at the mall and write essays about you as their personal hero? If so, you will need to evaluate your priorities from the beginning.
What’s the actual cost of working an extra shift every week just to pay off student debt a few years early? It likely means missing soccer games, family swim dates, and those precious moments when your child needs you most. In the long run, it might mean your house isn’t the one bustling with grandkids every holiday, and one day, you become the parent who complains their children don’t call enough.
This might sound hyperbolic, but look around your social circle. You’ll find plenty of evidence supporting this hypothesis. How your children connect with you as small kids shapes how they connect with you as adults. Parents who prioritize time with their kids raise kids who prioritize time with them—not out of obligation, but out of genuine desire.
At the beginning of a clinician’s career, it’s easy to lose sight of this. The labyrinth of medical debts and high earning potential can cloud one’s judgment. However, if you pause and reflect on what truly matters—your relationships, your happiness, your freedom—you might find a different path that doesn’t sacrifice the priceless for the costly and ultimately leads to a life of true fulfillment.
That future feels distant when you’re newly married, have kids in diapers, and have parents who still live independently. It’s easy to think that time is something you’ll always have more of, but in reality, you’ll always have less. Money is a renewable resource; time is not. So, I implore you to consider these three things when making your financial goals for the future:
1. Would my family say I work too much?
2. Do I feel content in my present relationships?
3. What does enough money mean to me?
Get super honest with yourself and truly consider what each question is asking. However, don’t let any of your answers send you into a shame spiral. Instead, use this information to course correct. Speak to a financial advisor who understands your core values. Discuss your visions, hopes, and dreams with your partner and agree on how to get there.
Remember, you’re not just making a living; you’re making a life. Stop putting off pleasure until you’re too old to enjoy it. Financial planning shouldn’t just help you create a dream retirement; it should also help you create a dream career life.
W. Ben Utley is a certified financial planner.
